Over the years I’ve embarked on any number of life improvement projects. Make my life easier, do things I love to do and so on. An extension of the broad concepts of both what I love to do and the time to do them.
Time is the interesting problem. When I was younger I had more time but didn’t have the resources I have now. I have resources now that save time, but I have less time to save. It is an interesting paradigm that happens as you get older. You have the concept of time, but effectively time isn’t there because no matter you manage your time you just don’t have time.
Time is the most interesting problem you will ever have. As a child time is old, beyond your grasp, ancient. As you age time doesn’t it like Benjamin Buttons goes backwards. As you slow down and age it speeds up shedding age and flitting about you can’t catch it as easily. It becomes harder to take time to make time. Memories cloud the picture and you cannot catch time.
You would think that the passing of time would be painful. But memories change the perception. Yes there is pain as you age. Your back hurts, your knees ache. But with each passing day there is more to remember. More to stop and enjoy. You find, you see and you remember a world around you. There are things you will always recall. Things that shaped who you are. There are things that stopped you at a time. Things that blocked you from moving forward. You didn’t see them coming sometimes. Sometimes they were there in front of you and with grappling hooks and ladders you attempted to scale them.
They, the walls in front of you, didn’t always block you. They didn’t always win. But they moved you. To the left or right. They forced your path to change, for a second, an hour, a week or forever. They changed you in subtle and in massive ways.
The passage of time a thief and gift. A wonder, a joy and loss. In all a journey all take. A path that wanders past us. We can’t stop time. We can’t like a great DVR in our lives pause time. We can, upon reflection, go back to a moment and recall that moment. Recall those seconds fleeting that passed. Perhaps a picture or a video that immerses us in what was for a moment. But effectively time passes as if without regard.
Time cheats. Time changes. Time flows. It fills your heart, it fills your day and ultimately it fills the world around you. Time is the great equalizer. The great emancipator. The great imprisoner. It is the one thing we all fear. It makes a mockery of treasures and treasure of moments. Time is both bad and good. Sometimes at the same time.