After 8 days away, I miss my family.

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The long journey away from the sun.

It is now 8 days since I left my family and headed west. I wonder about sailors and explorers and how they handled knowing that they might be gone for years. I find that I miss my wife after about 30 minutes on the airplane. I miss my kids after about 30 minutes on the airplane and that “feeling” remains with me the entire time I am gone.

I miss talking to my wife about my day, seeing her eyes responding to the happy and sad news of my day. I miss the gentle reassuring touch that you cannot get through a telephone. Not that simply hearing her voice isn’t wonderful, it is, but I miss the touch that lets me know we are connected (together).

Of course, then I focus on not missing my wife which never works and I realize I also miss the hub-bub that represents my children. I miss the noise and the love of my kids as well. I miss my sons giving me good night hugs, or my daughter pointing at her forehead and smiling at me.

I love my family, they represent what is good about my life.



Who, is the next you

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I have done a number of architect boards in the past 11 years. During that time I have asked people the candidates the question “who is the next you.” it is meant to be a question related to their mentoring programs and plans. It talks to the concept of how are you building someone to replace you.

So I have been thinking. What if instead of who is the next you, ask “what are you doing to build the next you.” Not about mentoring in that case from the mentee and helping others perspective rather from the what are you doing to improve your skills?

Who do you talk to? Who do you ask questions of? How large is your “circle of trust?” Does it grow or shrink over time? Is your inner circle filled with people who will tell you the “truth” but will refrain from telling you the “hard truth?”

The difference between the truth and the hard truth is your ability to recover from the presentation (the hard truth is very hard to recover from). But sometimes you have to have someone you trust tell you the hard truth. They need to watch you can know when that moment has arrived. They can’t tell you the hard truth all the time as you can’t grow in that scenario.

Does your inner circle nurture your skills? Help them grow? Do you extend your inner circle to bring in others that you are mentoring? To show them the weaker side of your own skills?

What are you doing to improve yourself to become the “new” you.”



To my wife :-)

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The connection that is marriage. I had a run in with someone the other day. Nothing big, but enough to shake me and make me uncomfortable. The end result was I had to talk about it with my wife.

There are many things that make marriage a wonderful thing, but having someone who is committed to you and willing to listen to things that are hurting you is an incredible gift. In fact it is more than a gift, it is something to cherish.

So this blog is for my wife.

I spent an entire blog talking about the amazing concept that was my daughter turning 18. But I have to say 20 years of marriage (which will be this June) seems to me to be even more incredible.

We’ve moved from Bloomington Indiana to Cincinnati Ohio in 1991. We moved back to Indianapolis in 1999. It has been without question the most amazing journey.

Dear Heart, I love you.



My circle of friends

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There are a number of people in the world that I look forward to talking to and spending time with. I wish the list were bigger sometimes (and probably although I don’t recall, smaller at times as well).

I wonder if your list is always a finite number (say 20) and really doesn’t vary from that. I’ve thought about it for a long time, but I haven’t really spent a lot of time on it. It’s almost a terminal velocity problem. Can you have a larger circle of close friends? Can one person be stretched that thin?

Of course then I wonder, in fact if it is in fact stretching. So that brings me to the energy you get from friends. Friends return something to you that you can’t always generate yourself. So, could you have a larger inner circle. Can that inner circle expand and contract at will?

I don’t stay awake thinking about this, but I do wonder…



The Cloud triangle

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The cloud migration triangle. I was introduced to a concept yesterday to consider about the “cloud.” The three pillars mentioned in the conversation were business, operations and people.

People represent the change management and training components that have to exist when you begin the concept of moving applications from where they have been the past 30 years to the new paradigm (The Cloud).

Business represents the assessment, the business function, architecture and other components we have today that have to change in the new Cloud paradigm other than their operations teams and operations requirements.

Finally you have the traditional operations that organizations run 0 they are called out separately as they have a considerable amount of change. Where once they had physical machines now everything is virtual.

I will continue to dive into this interesting idea.


Letting the good idea see the sunlight…

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Effective Planning and Human Dynamics

The study of how people interact (human dynamics) interferes frequently with the overall structured process of effective planning. I’ve spent a long time thinking about effective planning. I’ve done workshops with customers and with community groups with the same reality.

  • There are a small number of people willing to share new ideas.
  • There are a number of people who have new ideas but aren’t willing to share
  • There are a number of people who have great (or new ideas) that feel stifled by the environment and do not engage

There is an interesting problem that exists in any group of people when there is a topic to discuss. The loudest people are usually the ones that are heard.

1. Loud people are always heard

There is another interesting problem, deference. When someone has a nominal or weak position of leadership, they use that nominal leadership position to take leadership in a meeting. If there are two or more of them in the same meeting you have a huge issue.

2. nominal leaders always have to be heard

So how do you get around these two problems (and the others I list in my book Transitional Services or in my other blog ) and capture the missing ideas?

More on that coming…



A Circle of Friends

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How nice it is, to dine with a circle of friends. You forgot what wonder lies in the world until you can see where your friends are delighted and excited.

Thank you to all my friends, both at dinner last night and throughout the world. Each of you makes the world a better place with every breadth you take.

I forget as I wander through the days of my year how much my friends mean to me (and of course my best friend, my wife). They are the path I travel (or wish to travel) and the people that make me wish I was a better man.

To all of you on this day of love, thank you for everything.