In the quiet of a railway station (with apologies to Paul Simon)
Over the years I have talked about communication a number of times. Its years now in my blog rather than months or a year. That in and of itself is simply amazing. Roughly 10 people read this blog every day. Another 25 or so read my other blog every single day so I am communicating with someone and its not just myself.
Communication is the two way street where we find ourselves trying to connect with another persons ideas. It really isn’t as easy as people think. I know a number of highly successful people who frequently say “that person needs to come to me.”
Question 1, is there ever a situation where someone should come to someone else? Yes, but that is a hierarchy thing. The person in question (come to me) believes they are more important than the person coming to them. Its an interesting paradigm in communication as it never works well.
Question 2, its ok for me to point our your flaws but please don’t mention mine as you are most likely wrong. This is an interesting communication issue that crops up frequently where someone is happy to tell you what you did wrong, but they don’t want you to tell them what you did wrong.
These two little issues derail more conversations than any number of other issues (although there are a few issues that in fact derail things even more). I have thought about these for a long time and don’t really have an answer, I’ve just noticed the negative nature of the pattern.
The solution has to come from the person with the pattern.